Ned Henry January 23, 2021 · nedhenry.medium.com
It’s 9:42 AM. Had a good ambien induced sleep. My watch tells me I slept for 5 hours and 50 minutes. Only 15 minutes of deep sleep. January is a disaster for sleep. Only 2 days so far that are in the green zone, 4 in the yellow zone, the rest are all in the red zone including last night. December was better — only 3 red days, the rest of the nights actually were green or yellow. I hadn’t looked at the history until this morning. Anyway got up at 8 and got some coffee. Don’t feel like eating yet. I put on some very peaceful Back piano music very softly and read the first 2 chapters of Carey’s book. It’s good. I’ll keep reading it from time to time. Then I put the easy chair back and relaxed and breathed with little buddha sitting on my chest. I decided to come in here and start on my sharing. It’s time to hear my lesson for the day. I know I’m a day behind in the course but so what.
ACIM — Lesson 22 — What I see is a form of Vengeance. (Wish I could share the entire 7 minute video on this lesson. It’s an important one.)
!0:30 Just had a pretty good shit. TMI for most of you but it wasn’t those little hard pellets this time but softer and easier and it felt better. Not a big dump yet but definitely progress. I looked around while I sat there and worked on the lesson.
Through the door I saw one of Heather’s drawings. It’s hanging on the wall in my hallway. It’s called “Peppers Coming Out.”
Julie next door texted me that they were getting pizza for their Saturday dinner out. I thanked her and passed on the dinner. I have some easier on the stomach foods in the fridge. Was 201 lbs this morning. I’ll take it. Could not get below 206 in all of the year 2020. Also heard from AJ this morning and texted him back I was fine after my chemo day. Wrote to Jan and told her the doctors do not think deep tissue massage would be good for me right now. Not sure I agree with them but for now I’ll listen and hopefully touch base with her again in a month when the weather is warmer. I’d love to have her work on the energy flow in my body right now. And she is good at finding the places where it’s blocked and opening them up so energy flow is more natural and easy. Jan and Heather and Jane are a lot alike. All lesbian women with deep and long lasting partners who are kind and caring.
3:20 Been a busy day so far. Before I forget, this is next week’s opera line up at the Met all free on demand for one day each.
Monday, January 25
Mozart’s Don Giovanni
Tuesday, January 26
Rossini’s Le Comte Ory
Wednesday, January 27
Gounod’s Faust
Thursday, January 28
Verdi’s Falstaff
Friday, January 29
Wagner’s Der Fliegende Holländer
Saturday, January 30
Verdi’s Rigoletto
Sunday, January 31
Verdi’s Macbeth
I’ll be catching some of them. Let me know if you catch any of them.
So John across the street is going to go shopping for me tomorrow. I have to get him a list. He offered me Indian food tonight (which I love btw and have grown to really appreciate since I met AJ) but I passed this time until my stomach settles after chemo yesterday. Not sure what comfort food I’ll have but I do have some choices around here.
Had a good counseling session today. We talked about some astrology stuff which was very insightful both in my birth chart and in the current transits. It all makes sense. We also talked a little about sex which has always been a complicated issue for me.
4:15 — I got a call from Sue about the Covid vaccine distribution by Emory. I am on their waiting list and apparently they are starting to call people for appoinments. I called the number and played dumb about getting a call from them and then losing the message but jotting down this number. It kinda worked and kinda didn’t. I got a nice lady on the phone who heard me out, confirmed I was on the wait list for a call for an appointment, but could do nothing to get that appointment scheduled. It was the clinical team that did that. So I’m on the list but still waiting for an appointment. I told her I had cancer and asked if she could make a note of that in the record but she couldn’t. So like most of you, we wait for vaccine availability.
Sent a note to my lawyer about updating my will for distribution of the grand piano which is a family heirloom. That should get taken care of next week.
Also had a real good call with Steve in Jacksonville. He did not know I had cancer and well I thought he might want to know. He is an old friend from The Prosperos that I had lost touch with until we reconnected at the Spiritual Living Center of Atlanta which is the Religious science church where Paul Gonyea gave his talks. We have become very good friends again since that happy reunion. He is married to a wonderful woman named Monica. So we caught up and he asked for my blog link so I sent it. I’m not soliciting readers but I will make this available to anyone who wants it whether I know them or not and whether I know them well or not. I do look at those who are “following” me so I have an idea of who I am actually talking to besides myself.
It’s a beautiful warm day here in Atlanta so I am going back outside on the deck to sit and take in some more fresh air. Back later.
I can’t get enough of Bach piano. There’s an album on Apple Music called Bach Piano by Axel Gillison. It’s just so peaceful, so serene. Just talked to Jack and Lucy and friend John. Got caught up. Who cares? Doesn’t matter. But it was good for me.
I keep getting statements from Emory about all the charges I am racking up. But so far no bills and they have only asked for a few copays. I know it will be in the hundreds of thousands before I am all done but it looks like Medicare Advantage with United Healthcare is covering most of it. They haven’t asked me pay very much yet. Got a lovely card from cousin Cathy. She likes the US Mail so I think I’ll type and print a response and send it that way instead of text or email. I won’t hand write it. It would take too long and might not be very legible.
What I see is a form of vengeance. Very deep and interesting lesson today. Especially since I feel so good after chemo yesterday. It might be the Prednisone talking. I take that for 5 days after chemo and it is a steroid that makes you feel good, almost high and full of energy. Which is how I feel today.
Listening to Stabat Mater by Karl Jenkins. Bought the CD on Amazon since I couldn’t find it on Apple music. But then I found it. Gonna send the CD to Ronna. She will love it. Who wants CD’s? I’m gonna send them all out since I have them in the cloud now. Shoot me a note.
Sent my Whole Foods shopping list to John and he also picked up a mango Lassi for me from the Indian restaurant. It was too sweet so I added some plain yogurt to it to tone down the sugar. It might be easier for me to just place my own order with Whole foods. I think he does delivery anyway and since we live across the street from each other it would likley be on the same run. We’ll see what he says. So many people just want to help me out. It’s pretty humbling.
Well it’s about 8 PM. I think I might let this one fly and get stoned so I can feel my body better and do some stretching and walking in the house while I watch the opera tonight. Not sure I’ll slug through the whole Wagner opera. They are tough to sit through. But I will watch the beginning of Act 3 several times and be stoned when I do. Also want to catch the news which I taped. I missed it yesterday and want to see what David Brooks had to say on the Friday PBS Newshour yesterday. I like him. He is smart and insightful and gives commentary every Friday on the weeks events.
So later my friends. See you tomorrow.
What I see is a form of vengeance. (All that you fear does not exist.)