Ned Henry January 14, 2021 · nedhenry.medium.com

It’s 3:33 AM and I can’t sleep again. Sleeplessness has been by far my biggest side effect. I have talen and Ambien and a Bendryl. Hope they kick in. I’ll talk about Beowulf tomorrow but it the greatest story ever told. Tonight I was thinking about my graduation from UCSC. I had quit college one quarter short of graduation and needed just 20 credits to finish. I go back in Spring of 1979. I still had no major, I just wanted the damn degree because by now I could see the degree was important to make money. I made up a major and called it Human Development and it consisted of all the classes I had taken. It was an Independet major. They let you do that back then. So I got an advisor to sign off on the major and on my thesis. I got 10 credits for the thesis and had to find another 10. I took and TA’d at a kind of American Indian experience in one of the meadows on campus. We did all kinds of shit — dancing, pottery, making tee pees. Since I was older (29 by then) they had me TA a section of maybe 10 kids. Don’t remember that much about it except it was an easy 10 credits that I could fit into my new major. The other 10 were the thesis. I proposed to write a thesis comparing Thane from The Prosperos to Gurdjieff.George GurdjieffGeorge Ivanovich Gurdjieff (, Russian: Гео́ргий Ива́нович Гурджи́ев, Greek: Γεώργιος Γεωργιάδης, Armenian: Գեորգի…en.wikipedia.org

Thesis wasn’t that good but it got the job done and I got my BA in Spring of 1979 and never picked up my diploma. But I am legit.

Noon — Just got up. Once I crashed I crashed hard. Gotta shower and go wake up. Wow — the day’s getting away.

CIM — Lesson 13 — “ A Meaningless World Engenders Fear.”

It’s 3:30 PM — I’m finally sitting at my desk listening to “A Sea Symphony” by Vaughn Williams. What a day so far. It takes so much more energy just to do simple things like take a shower. It took 2 hours to shower (pulling hair out in the process) Hair is everywhere. Once it’s all gone I want to pay someone a lot of money on a nice day. I will sit out on the deck and they will come in and do a thorough Spring cleaning. I would pay several hundred dollars for that. So I shower and then dry off, tend to the open sore on my leg, spread lotion on my back with this applicator I got from Amazon, get dressed. I got a load of laundry in. It’s a big load but it’s been through the wash cycle. I ran it again through the entire cycle with no soap. That’s how I do laundry. I run the full cycle with the soap and stuff and then I do it again with no soap so the clothes get rinsed like 3 times. They are in the dryer now. That will take 90–120 minutes. Then fold and put away. It’s a BIG load and I have more to do another day. Ate the last of the fish eyes with my morning meds and then after the shower had a bowl of those steel cut oats.

Pete came over and brought me some chicken soup which I’ll have for dinner. We had a nice visit on the back deck. I gave him a serving of the shepherd’s pie. I’ll be interested if he likes it since he is such a good cook. He took another picture of me with more hair falling out.

It’s getting thinner. Pete is going to bring me s big meal this weekend which I can eat for a few days before I go into the next round of chemo. Good guy. We are dead opposite politically but he is a good friend who I know cares about me.

So I KNOW that there are folks out there reading this. even if they are not the “followers” that I see on the site. I keep getting things in the mail. Today I got an XL BODY HEATING WRAP from Amazon and I have no idea who sent it. But I will give it a try. And then I got the most thoughtful and loving C.A.R.E. package from Allison. Your card brought tears of joy to my eyes Allison. I have it in front of me on this desk and I am going to go back to it over and over again. This is what sustains me. Allison also sent her favorite socks for hiking in the Cascades and some 5 hour foot warmers and toe warmers — like the ones we used to use while skiing. You just break the seal and pop one in each ski boot and they keep your toes warm all day. I used them often on ski trips. Thank you Allison you so very special young woman. You are in my heart always.

So I want to talk about Beowulf for a minute. It’s on Amazon Prime not Netflix. I forgot I had a Blue Ray of it so I went ahead and bought the HD version on Amazon as well. This is a movie to watch many many times.Beowulf (2007 film)Beowulf is a 2007 3D computer-animated fantasy action film directed and co-produced by Robert Zemeckis, written by Neil…en.wikipedia.org

I would not recommend the free version with commercials. The Beowulf story is my story. I literally can see myself in every single second of this film. I am all the characters — major, minor, incidental without regard to gender or species. Now someone will come along and make a better movie of this story someday but this is the best one so far. If you liked Game of Thrones, then you will like this movie. Watching this last night was an incredible experience once again. Do yourself a favor and watch this film for the first, second or third time. It is that good. Now the version on Amazon has at least 3 edits that I noticed. I am going to go look for an unedited version. But even the edited version on Amazon is just fine. The unedited version if it’s available is just a little bit better in some crucial scenes. Such a good movie.

This is a lovely piece of music. (A Sea Symphony) The very first concert I sang with a chorus was by Ralph Vaugh Williams, “Dona Nobis Pacem”. I sang with Anchorage Community Chorus. My mom framed the poster and gave it to me for Christmas. Here’s a picture.

Tried to take pic hanging on the wall over the piano but too much glare so I took it down. The hook fell out of the wall. So anyway I took a couple more shots but this is the best I could do. Sorry about the glare. I decided the post the one with me in it. So this was a Christmas concert in 1974 on Demember 14,15 and 16. The first half was Dona Nobis Pacem. I’m gonna go find it and turn it on. So the first half was Dona Nobis Pacem — a mass for peace (in the Middle East). Words were written by Walt Wittman and others. This is the detail on the poster of

the soldiers. The best I could get without taking it down again. It’s a pretty short piece so we sang it and then there was an intermission and then we sang traditional Christmas Carols by English composers for the second half of the concert and my choral singing career was off to a start. Here’s are the some of the lyrics.

“We looked for peace, but no good came; and for a time of health, and behold trouble! The snorting of his horses was heard from Dan; the whole land trembled at the sound of the neighing of his strong ones; for they are come, and have devoured the land…and those that dwell therein… The harvest is past, the summer is ended, and we are not saved… Is there no balm in Gilead?; is there no physician there? Why then is not the health of the daughter of my people recovered? — Jeremiah 8: 15–16, 20, 22 [6] O man greatly beloved, fear not, peace be unto thee, be strong, yea be strong. — Daniel 10: 19 The glory of this latter house shall be greater than of the former … and in this place will I give peace. — Haggai 2: 9 Nation shall not lift up a sword against nation, neither shall they learn war any more. — Isaiah 2: 4 And none shall make them afraid,…neither shall the sword go through their land. — Leviticus, 26: 6 Mercy and truth are met together; righteousness and peace have kissed each other. Truth shall spring out of the earth, and righteousness shall look down from heaven. — Psalm 85: 10 Open to me the gates of righteousness, I will go into them. — Psalm 118: 19 Let all the nations be gathered together, and let the people be assembled; … and let them hear, and say, it is the truth. — Isaiah 43: 9 And it shall come, that I will gather all nations and tongues. And they shall come and see my glory. And I will set a sign among them … and they shall declare my glory among the nations. For as the new heavens and the new earth, which I will make, shall remain before me, so shall your seed and your name remain forever’. — Isaiah 66: 18–19, 22 Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men. — Luke 2: 14

This Dewey Ehling, my first choral director. I was SOLD on choral singing after this first concert. And it has been the source of so much richness and joy in my life ever since. When you go through old photos you find the darnedest things. But I owe a huge sense of gratitude to this man for accepting me in the chorus with no experience and first exposing me to the magnificence of choral singing.

The next piece The Anchorage Community Chorus took on was the Verdi Requiem. This is a HUGE piece so this chorus must have been at least 130 voices. You just don’t take on the Verdi Requiem with a small ensemble. I have never sung again it in Atlanta after some 20+ years. I’ve heard the Atlanta symphony and chorus do it at the Woodruff Arts Center. I put it on so I’ll listen to it as I continue to write away. Verdi and Donizetti are by far my favorite opera composers. So let’s talk about opera since it’s on the brain. Here is Elvira Voth.

She’s on the left. The girl on the right I dated for a little while. Elvira was the Director of the Achorage Civic Opera. And she is who got me started singing in opera choruses. The accompanist for the Community Chorus suggested I audition for the opera chorus. I did and got in. Now singing opera is FUN FUN FUN. I have loved opera ever since I guess because I have seen it from the inside and I understand from experience just how rich and rewarding opera really is. It is larger than life, over the top with implausible coincidences leading to tragic results. Again the word Magnificence comes to mind. I have lots of pictures of me in opera costumes. let me go find

some. I’ll just throw a few in here and keep writing next to them. So I sang in La Traviata and Lucia di Lamermoor with the Acnhcoarge Civic Opera. We started rehearsals for Rigoletto but I did not stay in Anchorage to perform it. I just couldn’t take the darkness in the winter anymore. The cold never bothered me. You dress for it. You have a parka and can deal with it but the darkeness is a

whole different animal. In Anchorage the sun would come up at 11 AM and set at 2 PM. It was night for 21 hours a day. That is really really hard to take. I got depressed, drank too much, and just got to where I could not take the cabin fever any longer. I left Anchorage for good in 1978 and that’s a whole nother story driving back to California with my twin sisters. Besides Traviata and Lucia,I sang in a production of Camelot that Dewey Ehling directed with the Anchorage Community Theater. That was so fun. Very low budget so you would do the backstage work as well as go on stage when you had to do something there. I was one of Mordred’s henchman but also was pulling the curtain and doing all sorts of stuff. Rehearsals were going back and forth between performing and

doing production stuff. I would move back and forth seamlessly. We all did. And finally after I was back in San Francico for the second time in 1981 I sang with the Gilbert and Sullivan group there at the time called The Lamplighters. We did an HMS Pinafore that KQED showed on TV and I have a recording of it now transferred to DVD. That’s what I watched with Kay Redmond when I was helping

her out at the end. She wanted to watch it so we did. I never got a chance with True Colors to be on stage. I was always behind the scenes. Same with Theatrical Outfit when I worked there. I did accounting, project management and company management for theater in Atlanta but in Anchorage and San Francisco I got to perform. And that was more fun. I just love the idea of collaboration. Opera, Theater, Project Management, Choral singing, Sales, Sports, everything I do in my life is so much richer when done in collaboration with others.

This is me as Dracula for a Halloween party in San Francisco one year. Dressing up is fun. Pretending is fun. Playing is fun. It’s funny how as I “grew up” I ended up playing less and less. Life got so serious and intense. And now with cancer even more so.

I remember a guy I went to seminary with. His name was Vince Lins. I’ve long lost touch

with him. Here he is. We were at seminary both wanting to be priests as freshman and sophmores in high school. Vince was a troubled guy. He never quite found himself. He wasn’t so in touch with reality some of the time and it got worse over time. Sure he did lots of drugs in those hippie years but Vince never seemed to come back to reality. I ended out friendship after he came into my “quite

respectable” office building in downtown San Francisco. This is me working there. Well I’m in an office I share with a woman and we are auditing these huge invoices from contractors on the North Slope. I mean we are approving payments for millions and millions of dollars a week. This was a serious job. Ties, nice clothes, the whole deal. And I’m doing pretty good. This is after the hotel at Fisherman’s wharf job was done. I’m getting a career together to be able to make money. Still don’t have my degree but I’m seeing the real monetary value of having it. Well Vince rides up the elevator to the 17th floor — barefoot, no shirt just jeans — he looked like he is in the picture. And I am working in a respectable and good job. He just wanted to hang out. He didn’t get the concept that I was working, had a job I wanted to keep and couldn’t just leave and go hang out with him. I was pretty mean in retrospect but I just told him to go away and never come back. And he did and he never came back. I wonder if he ever got the help he needed with mental illness. It’s 7 PM. I’m gonna stop for awhile and get some of that chicken soup Pete brought over. Later.

Almost 9 PM — The soup was wonderful as expected. Watched the PBS Newshour just to keep up. folded the laundry and I have the Met on TV in the other room. I’m just gonna tell you about that and then boogie and go watch this opera.

During Covid, the Met started showing one opera a day every day for free and they are still doing it. In the beginning that’s all I did. I watched an opera every night. All of them either were older prodcutions with STARS like Pavoratti or Domingo or Price. But most were more recent prodcutions and these guys know how to do opera. Now I like some operas better than other but watching so many this year on TV has helped me expand my appreciateion of the art form as well as composers I didn’t think I would like like Wagner. So here is the link. They put a new one up every day. Today isOn DemandFrom old-school legends to today’s great stars, experience more than 700 full-length Met performances with our online…www.metopera.org

one I have never seen or heard by Rossini. Armida. It’s lovely. Bookmark this link so you can come back to it. Get on their mailing list so you know if an opera you might like is coming up. they put out a weekly schedule of what they will be showing. Some folks get all caught up in that since they can’t follow (almost always in another language) the story, they just don’t like opera. They can’t just forget about the story and listen to the music. You can read the story before you ever sit down to see an opera if you want. But it’s not necessary. Just listen to the music. Enjoy the pagentry and spectacle of the staging and costumes and light design, get the story if you can. But it’s really all about the music. Get out of it whatever you can. And the more you put into it the more you will get out of it. It is a most fulfilling experience. So I am going to go now and watch the rest of this opera. It’s been a fun day.