Ned Henry January 4, 2021 (nedhenry.medium.com)
Listening to a Grateful Dead jam this morning. Feeling good. Didn’t sleep a lot of hours but got the best QUALITY sleep I have gotten since chemo. I feel rested. So in talking with family yesterday on FaceTime, they told me that it was hard to follow this blog in chronological order. And they never knew if something new was posted. So…here is what I will do. I am going to title every entry as My Cancer Journey and I am going to date it. If I happen to make 2 entries in one day I will put down vol 1 or 2 but I don’t expect that. My plan is to post once at night when I’m ready.
So far there have been 6 entries — this is the 7th. I’m not gonna go back and try to fix the old titles. The 6 entries in chronological order are:
12/31 — My Cancer Journey 7 min read,
12/31 — So I want to Continue writing…2min read,
1/1 My Cancer Journey — 54 min read,
1/2 Here we go again….14 Min read,
1/3 — My Cancer Journey Contiued — 17 min. read
1/3 My Cancer Journey — 5 min read.
Obviously if you follow the links and listen to the music it’s gonna take longer than the times they indicate. I’ll keep my label titles straight from now on. I am NOT looking for followers but I welcome them. I really do. If anyone wants to follow along with me on this journey, I am more than delighted to have the company. The best way to do that is to “Follow” me. There is a button to do that someplace. I have 7 people following me right now — mostly family. But anyone is welcome. If you’ve read this far you know that this is me processing not just my cancer but my whole life. and I’ve had a pretty interesting life so far and plan to have a lot more of it. The blog jumps around and is a little disjointed and full of typos and like I said in one of the posts, full of blemishes and flaws just like me. This will be too tough or too “FAR OUT” there for some folks and that’s OK. It’s my stuff. You can take it or leave it. It’s OK.
So Jerry is jamming. I’m gonna go grab another cup of coffee. I have labs this morning at 10. Later.
Lesson 4 from The Course in Miracles (workbook) this morning: “These Thoughts Don’t Mean Anything!”
Back home. Labs are done and I’ve got Jerry cranking again. Hope to get out for a walk outside today if the weather warms up a little. I have some administrative things to take care of today. I did get all my appointments straightened out at Winship. They still need to confrim a couple of things but the ambiguity on the portal is being addressed. When I clicked that link on my Bellsouth email account, it did send some spam emails out to some current friends — a couple who might even be reading this but also to some blasts from the past. So I have to send out an email telling these folks that I did not send a link to them. I know better. I was just so caught up in writing yesterday that when the email popped up that I needed to do something or lose my Bellsouth email account, I just automatically reacted. I’m not mad at myself or anything but it just complicates things. So I’ll take responsibility and notify folks. I’m still not getting BEllsouth emails on my phone so I have to fix that sometime soon. Right now I only get Gmail emails on the phone. So and this is for Ronna especially — my very LEAST technical sister. I mean she has trouble reading emails and answering them. Texts are almost beyond her. She’s a love. She lives on the Oregon coast. Ronna, When you get ANY email telling you you need to click a link or something bad will happen, instead of ever clicking the link, check the email address that sent it. You do this by going to the sender’s email address and clicking on it it highlight it and going to the down arrow at the end of the address. If it says ANYTHING other than the official address of the person that says they sent it to you, immediately delete the email. I know most of you know this and well I do too. John taught me. John is my Apple tech guru. And I miss sitting next to him in rehearsal and singing with him since he changed choirs, but we see each other often and communicate nearly daily with texts. OK I’m off to do some chores and and other stuff. Listen to Jerry if you have some. Doesn’t matter what. There’s a DEAD station on Sirus XM. I programmed a button in the car so I can just go to it whenever I want. They play Jerry 24/7 — these long, long concerts and jams. Really really amazing. I’ll tell you about when I saw them in Anchorage after I get some things done. But I did want to show you something.
This was from October 3 at my really goods buddy John’s house sitting out in his back yard. He throws the best parties but I didn’t want to go to the last one this summer for Vesna because of Covid. So a few weeks later he invited me over and grilled a really nice dinner for us and his fiancé, Gina. John is another truck driver and we share You Tube music videos with each other. Later that month he installed outside LED lights on MY deck so my deck is now (and will be forever) a cool place to hang out on at night (when it’s warmer). So John took this pic and told me I looked like Jerry Garcia. What do you think? Jerry is rocking. Later. Before I forget. Just wanted to let you know that my vote in the Georgia senate runoff election has been accepted so it will be counted. Guess who I voted for? I also got my $600 from congress. Pretty cool.
So back again. Spent all day getting labs and taking care of medical admin stuff and getting my technology stuff at least partially repaired. Still not getting my Bellsouth emails on my phone but I’ll figure that out. John helping me run some errands in his brand new ALL electric car. A Volvo.
Been listening the Grateful Dead jams ALL day. The Grateful Dead was a prolific band and they were totally open and always have been. They didn’t “protect” anything so if you wanted to record a concert, you were free to do so from way back in the 60’s. Their archive of music is MASSIVE and btw — it all housed at — you guessed it — The University of Californa at Santa Cruz. When you listen to the Dead, don’t play the singles or “hits” on the records. Get LIVE versions where they do these do these long free flowing jams that just go and go — the creativity just oozes out them. And it doesn’t really matter what concert you listen to or when it was recorded. Just listen to Live versions. I saw them a few times. The first time I was like a sophmore in college and we drove up to San Francisoc from Santa Cruz for New Year’s eve at Winterland. On the card that night was the Dead, the Airplane and Quicksilver. I dropped acid that night. Amazing. I don’t remember that much except that I had a lot of fun.
Well I moved to Alaska in I guess 1976 or so. Got a job working on the pipeline on the North slope.
Here’s a pic. Worked for Halliburton of all people. I did not do manual labor. I have never had those kinds of skills. But I did do office work and during the construction of that project we worked 7 — 10 hour days on the slope. Money ws good especially for kid. Food was Great and they showed free movies every night. Saw Slapshot for the first time. Now there’s a fun one. Paul Newman. So after some 10 weeks or so, I got promoted to the Anchorage office where I worked a 40 hour week for the same money. Pretty good deal. I jumped since the slope was well pretty isolated. I’ve always been kind of a City kid anyway. So I’m living in an aprtment in Anchorage and the Dead are coming to town. The Dead used to travel with an entourage. So it was the band, the roadies, the groupies, the deaheads and well they would just go to a place for a few days and have concerts to pay for the trip and just party and make music. So 2 concerts were planned in Anchorage on a Friday and Saturday night druing one summer probably 1978 maybe. I bought tickets to both. They added a Sunday I bought tickets (actually probably just one ticket as I recall) for that. What a weekend. Wasn’t really doing drugs at all in those days but it didn’t matter — the Dead just played on an on all night every night for 3 days and never repeated a single song. Yeah I am Deadhead even though I never followed them around the country. But I didn’t miss chance to hear them when I could. And you shouldn’t either. Just listen to anything LIVE. You’ll have fun. I guarantee it.
So I never did tune back in to that Bears game. Still don’t know won and really don’t care. I barely hung on to second place money in the Fan Duel league. Third place scored big and came within 3 points of catching me and of course I took a zero yesterday cuz I didn’t enter a line up. But I held on. Here is my FF season this year. I’m just putting this up for fun.
Auction League. My team is SLUGFEST. Entry fee was $50 and I made nothing. (I won this league last year and SlugFest is on a trophy someplace.)
Keeper League. My team is SLUGGERS. Entry Fee was $55 and I made my money back. $55. I missed the playoffs but made 7th place money — best of non playoff teams and this league paid back entry fee if you were first of non playoff teams. I have won this league in the past. I made a bad trade at end of last year of a high draft pick for player and it didn’t work out .
Vampire League. My team is SLUGS IN LOVE. Entry fee was $20 and I didn’t win the league so I made nothing. First year for this one.
Hacker’s League. My team name is SLIMY SLUGS. Entry Fee was $115 and I took third place. Made $120 for third place money.
Fan Duel MPT League. My team name is SLUG1234. Entry Fee was $200 and I took 2nd place and won 3 individual weeks in the season. Made $428.70.
So like always I did slightly better than break even. All the leagues have different scoring and drafting citeria. Great group of guys. Poker players. I don’t play poker well enough to hang with them so I rarely play with them but I can whenever I want. They’re happy to take my money. Some good friends here but none that would read this blog. Probably gonna give it up next year. Takes too much time.
This one’s for Liz. She texted me today that she loves the blog.
And one more…Jack turned me on to this band. Have seen them a couple of times at Eddie’s Attic in Decatur (where I live).
Take a look at this photo. It’s all my Aunts and Uncles, Garandma and Grandpa, Mom and Dad and lots of cousins. Many more were to come in future years. I’m even in there too wearing a bow tie. Now you tell me, who is the best looking man in that picture? It’s not even close. Uncle Don is by far the best looking man in our entire family. And it’s not even close. If you haven’t figured out who he is yet, I’ll post another picture of him at the end of this section. Aunt Mary was the first of the sisters to get married I think. Pretty sure. I might be wrong. And she was married to Uncle Don. Aunt Mary was a stewardess. She’s pretty hot too btw. She worked for Pan Am or TWA — one of those airlines long gone. Aunt Mary and Uncle Don’s only daughter — only child is Cathy. Cathy had to take early retirement this year from Delta due to Covid. I have a Delta pass card from Cathy that lets me fly cheaper that regular fare but you have to fly stand by and well that really doesn’t work anymore since all the flights are so full. But it really helped me get back to California to see Mom and Dad during those lean years in my 50’s. Maybe during Covid I could get on a red eye but well cancer you know, I don’t even go to the groocery store. An airport would be unthinkable. So Aunt Mary and Uncle Don are married and Don works with my dad at a company called Easterling. They made silver — like real silver silverware. You know the kind nobody uses anymore. I inherited my mom’s set of Easterling Silver and gave it to Jack’s oldest daughter, Lucy so she could have something from her grandma to pass on to her daughter or whoever if she wants. Lucy is a senior in high school and is weighing college options these days. So my dad and Don work together and my dad is single and Don is married to this woman who has lots and lots of sisters. I don’t know how it all came together — before my time — but Don or Mary who knows tells them all that there is this guy that Don works with who’s not really all that good looking but is a “Prince of guy.” They try to set up Aunt Jean with my dad. Aunt Jean is Johnny’s mother — you remember — he’s like the third person I wrote about. “How ya doin’ Young man?” Well Jean doesn’t want any part of a blind date with my dad. So my mom, Rosemary, pops up and says I’ll give it a try. And that’s how my parents met. Don was the greatest guy you’d ever want to meet. He was kind, generous, loving and fun. I remember when I was maybe 5 years old or so and I was staying over at their house. All of us cousins slept around at other cousins houses all the time. So Uncle Don is in the bathroom shaving one morning. Now those were the days when you had that cup with the shaving soap and the brush and you’d make up a lather and spread it all over your face. And I think he used a straight razor. Not sure if safety razors had been invented in 1955. So he’s in there shaving and I am curious about what the heck is going on. So he teaches me how to shave. He lathers up my face with the shaving cream and hands me a popsicle stick and we shave together. That is such a great memory for me of one of the most favorite people in my life.
Uncle Don died of cancer at a very young age. I don’t even really know what kind of Cancer. This was in the late 50’s I think and there was no such thing as chemo. Heck I doubt they even knew what DNA was back then. It came quick and it took him quick. It broke everyone’s heart. Can’t really say that Aunt Mary ever recovered. And Cathy missed having a long relationship with her father. Cathy sent me this picture of him today. Here he is with Aunt Mary and Cathy. He coulda been a movie star. Best looking man in the family and one of the best people in a family full of them.
Listening to Bill Evans. I’ll go find a taste for you. (Holy crap. This link is 8 hours long. Bookmark it. Go back to it.)
This takes me to 2 stories. I really like telling stories in case you didn’t notice.
The first is about Aubrey. Aubrey is who turned me on to Bill Evans. I have his big Box set now loaded in the cloud. 9 CD’s. If you want to pick up a great album — Bill Evans, I Will Say Goodbye is one I love. Aubrey is I think the only real transgender person I really know. We’ve lost touch over the years. She was Steve when I first met her. Married with 2 beautiful strong sons. She was a massage therapist and rented space at Shambhala to earn her/his livng at the time and I was a client. She — I’m just gonna call her what she is was also an herbalist and knew all about Chinese herbs. She had jars and jars of these sticks and seeds pods and powders and all kinds of shit that she’s pull off the shelf and mix up some kind of batch of tea that I’d go home and boil to make a big pot of what would help with allergies or whatever else was ailing me at the time. And it really worked. Aubrey was also a Buddhist and a pianist. I used to host fund raisers for Shambhala at my little house in Decatur where I am now. Now I live in a little house. A pretty simple one story ranch with a living room/dining room which is the biggest room in the house, 2 bedrooms — I sleep in one and the other is an office, a kitchen, baths, and a kind of den thing that I don’t use much so it’s more of a hall. Maybe 1200 square feet. Not big. And I bought the Grand Piano grandma gave to my dad — he played btw, (We’re gonna talk about Mom and Dad sometime soon)and moved it from San Diego to Atlanta. I never played it very much. I can tell you about my experience with piano lessons another time. I hope I get to all these memories. Anyway, there were lots of artistic types in Shambhala. Aubrey gave the first of these fund raiser concerts in my living room. She played an all Bach program. Just beautiful. Now the thing about meditators is that, when they sit on cushions, they don’t take up much room. So we could fit some 50 or 60 in my little living room dining room combination all in rows on cushions. We had some nice parties and concerts in there. One time a professional from New York was in town for a Buddhist class or something I got the piano tuned to 5ths instead of octaves which brightens the sound — that’s what the piano tuner told me — , this guy played Chopin etudes that literally soared around the room. It was etherial, the sound coming out of that Conover Grand piano and floating in the air above us, surrounding us with gorgeousness and touching our ears and our hearts ever so. It was the definition of presence. So high. That piano needs new home btw. I’m not playing it and it’s taking up space. I thought I would play it but I never did. I will donate it if we can’t find it a new home. It’s a family heirloom but well it’s big. I mean a full grand not a baby grand. Not a Concert grand but a pretty big piano. I think it cost me $5K to move it from San Diego to Atlanta some 20 years ago. I thought I would take the time to learn how to play some tunes but I never seemed to find the time to make that happen. Liz knows Aubrey. The last time I saw Aubrey with her wife (who made the transition with her) at a Collegium concert. I wasn’t singing that semester — I think I had missed too many reheasals with my knee replacements or something. So I collected the money and ran the ticket stuff at the back of house. We had such a nice visit catching up and of course she loved our concert. Not sure which one it was. I have CD’s of most of them.
OK so you’re still listening to Bill Evans right…Well You Tube just gave me this concert of his called The Last Waltz. I have never heard it before. Oh I have to digress cuz I want to remember to give my Bill Evans box set and my Keith Jarret box set to James now that I have them both in the cloud. James is Pete’s youngest son and a pretty good jazz pianist in his own right. He went to Georgia Tech a real brainiac now working in technology someplace around here. James would love these CD’s. He’d play with his brother Tommy who played jazz sax at parties at Pete and Sasha’s. Ok that was little boring for you — so what — I watered the seed that I had planted in my brain when I loaded them in the cloud. The Last Waltz. We talked about concerts at the beginning of this days post. Well maybe the very best one I ever went to was called The Last Waltz of the Band. Martin Scorsese made a movie of it that’s on Netflix. The 40th anniversary of that concert was a couple of years ago and they re-release a box set of it for that occasion. Now I have to asume you’ve heard of the Band. They were Dylan’s back up band on Blonde on Blonde. — remember Memphis Blues Again from a couple of days ago. Well that’s the BAND. They were great. I mean really great. I’ll get you some of their music on another day. Just enjoying Bill Evans right now. The Band decided — well the leader Robbie Robertson decided that they didn’t want to tour anymore. That road life was just too hard and took too much out of them. I know, I traveled for business sales for 20 years. It’s a hard life. (The Grateful Dead figured out how to keep it fun and they thrived on it.) Different strokes. So the Band decided to do a farewell last concert and they called it The Last Waltz. They held it in Winterland in San Francisco and well I just happened to be living in that Clay street apartment then with a roommate whose name I forgot and we decided to get tickets. Winterland held maybe 5,000 people. Something like that. (That’s where I took that acid trip on that New Year’s Eve with The Dead and the Airplane.) Tickets were $45. Now this was not just a concert. The movie doesn’t even touch the experience. And the movie is REALLY good — check it out on Netflix. Here’s the first sentence from the Wikepdia page. “The Last Waltz was a concert by the Canadian-American rock group The Band, held on American Thanksgiving Day, November 25, 1976, at Winterland Ballroom in San Francisco.”
Now this was so much more than a great concert. The stage set was from the San Francisco opera’s production of La Traviata (an opera I sang in the chorus in Anchorage). Well get to my modest performing stuff sometime. They opened the doors at about 4 PM and served a full sit down Thanksgiving dinner to everybody. I mean they were carving turkeys, mashed potatoes, gravy, dressing, cranberry sauce, the whole 19 yards. It was really something. You could go back and get seconds if you wanted. The food stations stayed opened for 2 hours or so. So everyone was WELL FED and with turkey so tryptophan which just mellowed out the entire crowd. Lots of weed smoked in there. We brought some but everyone was sharing. At 6 PM or so, a string ensemble came to the stage and played waltz music while the crowd laid back and chilled. Some people dressed in formal clothes waltzed on the floor in front of the stage. The movie captures none of that. At about 9 PM I guess, the Band comes to the stage. They play everything they have ever recorded. The first guest star was a rocker that gave the Band their first gig with him as a back up band. Ronnie Hawkins. I didn’t know him. Then the following guest stars showed up to join in one by one. Sometime it was just the Band — other songs were The Band and a guest start of 2 or 3 or however many. Paul Butterfield, Eric Clapton, Neil Diamond, Dr. John, Joni Mitchell, Van Morrison, Ringo, Muddy Waters, The Staples singers, Ronnie Wood from the Stones, Neil Young. Emmy Lou Harris is in the movie at rehearsal but she didn’t perform at the concert. Dylan came out last. They played for some 4 hours. The movie is less than 2 hours long and has lots of intevviews with the members of the Band so as good as the movie is and it is, there was so much more. I mean it was an incredible concert. Best rock concert I ever got to hear. Do go check out the movie. You will have fun watching and listening but play the music loud. The movie opens with Baby Don’t Do It which was the encore and they were really cooking by then. Here’s a RECENT YouTube from “Playing for Change” (worth a YouTube subscription for sure) of Robbie Robertson leading a group of musicians from all over the world in The Weight — The Band’s biggest hit and one I know you know. Don’t leave Bill Evans if you’re enjoying him but give this a listen sometime. The Last Waltz is a memory I treasure.