“Keeping track . . . keeping a journal” by Mike Zonta, H.W., M.

A few months ago I was taking a class at CCSF called Digital Media and I learned of something called a portfolio.  A portfolio is a website in which someone can showcase their digital media creations such as  audio podcasts, photoshopping and new videos.

Then our wonderful teacher, Malcolm Cecil, said some people even include an online diary like a personal blog.  My ears perked up because I have been keeping a diary/dream journal for years in which I try to link the events of my waking life with the events in my dream life.

So, beginning on July 18 of this year, I began posting my daily journal/dream journal for all the world to see.  To those who think this is too much exposure, I disagree.  A student of Truth has to be willing to expose, if only to him/herself, all the dark corners of his/her psyche to the light of day.  And if other people see it, who cares?  Let them discover and shed light on their own dark corners.

So here’s an example of my latest listings and a link for further exploration of my Diary:

November 10, 2018:  Another smoky day. S.F. Feels like a war zone. In ’til 3ish. Walked w/my face mask to the library. Henry there. Then walk to G.P. Seth at C.B. Also other cute Asian guy as I left. Walk to Safeway. Myka has his face mask on. In the middle of chatting w/Myka, Steven leaned in from the adjacent checkout stand to join the conversation. I hadn’t known he was there, and he threw me off balance, which I think was his intent.  Drop/break plate in p.m. That usually means something.

November 10 dream:  Am staying at place w/lots of others close by. Working on something.

November 10 dream:  Woman in line said I blew a toothpick into her eye. Later she tried to make a date w/me. I snuck out of store. Ran into two well-built male friends who eventually became shirtless and then were only wearing towels, as did their adolescent son and a baby held who was held up against one of their naked chests, just to be in touch.

November 9, 2018:  Smoky day in S.F. People advised to stay indoors. Took #49 to Van Ness. Noisy, homeless guy sitting behind me asked me to open my window. I say, “No.” Bought face mask. Went to 1001 Franklin to get waitlist application. 300 on waiting list. Very old people hanging out in lobby. Go to Main Library to take a pee in the homeless restroom. Then search Market Street for Friday’s Chronicle. Finally find one at 4th & Market drug store. Take N into Cole Valley. Sign on way: “11:59:59.” Nicest thing that happened so far today. Go to Peet’s Cole Valley. Try to catch #43 home. #37 arrives first. So I take it to the Castro. Old lady smiles at me just before I walk past 440 Club to J’s store at 19th & Castro. #35 to G.P arrives quickly. Take BART to Balboa. Then #8 home. Chronicle headline: “Wildfire devastates Butte County Town” instead of “Wildfire devastates Paradise [which is the name of the Butte County town in question]. Insight: my Dad was playacting his entire life. Just like me.

November 9 dream:  Transcribing cube with writing on it to second cube. (h.o.)

November 9 dream:  Pushed veteran too far and he got in trouble. Einstein was there but I didn’t apologize to him, even though he told me not to.

November 9 dream:  Veteran had to be informed about loss of someone. He seemed cheerful. Some assumed he hadn’t been informed yet.

November 9 dream:  Carol Burnett as transsexual in movie promo.

November 9 dream:  I took cash from company safe. Somehow I rationalized that I wasn’t stealing. Decided to give it back.

November 9 dream:  Returning from abroad. I walk thru part of S.F. I’ve never walked thru before. Older Frenchwoman being a real snob, in French, at local store.

Link to my Diary:  https://zontaphotos.com/diary/

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TRANSLATION ADVENTURE – 11/11/18

Translators: Ben Gilberti, Alex Gambeau, Zoe Robinson, Bo Lebo, Heather Williams

SENSE TESTIMONY:  Evil appears personified.

5th Step Conclusions:

1)  The Absolute unknowable is formless thinking force the I AM Beingness of Truth.
2)  One boundless Truth is here now expressing and impressing One Infinite Mind.
3)  Hence that which is so is the One True Substance, Boundless, Omnipresent Beingness.
4)  All that can appear is the infinite oneness of Truth in and as consciousness.
5)  To come.

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I’ve Always Never Believed In You – featuring Donna Lynne Champlin – “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend”


racheldoesstuff
Published on Nov 9, 2018
GET THE SONG: https://lnk.to/ceg4

I’ve Always Never Believed In You
Starring Donna Lynne Champlin
Written by Rachel Bloom, Jack Dolgen, and Adam Schlesinger

Paula:

YOU STAND BEFORE ME A MAN, FULLY-GROWN
READY TO TAKE ON THE WORLD, HEADING OUT ON YOUR OWN
YOU’RE NOW SO THOUGHTFUL, STRONG, AND WISE
I’M PROUD, BUT I’M ALSO SURPRISED
‘CAUSE I ALWAYS NEVER BELIEVED IN YOU
I NEVER GAVE UP GIVING UP ON YOU
DEEP INSIDE, I ALWAYS KNEW
THAT YOU’D EVENTUALLY NEVER COME THROUGH
NOT FOR A SECOND, DID I THINK
YOU WOULDN’T END UP DEAD OR IN THE CLINK
FOR POSSESSION OR ASSAULT OR WORSE, IT’S TRUE
‘CAUSE I’VE ALWAYS NEVER BELIEVED IN YOU
THE MOMENT YOU WERE BORN
THEY PLACED YOU IN MY ARMS
AND I LOOKED INTO YOUR EYES AND THOUGHT,
“WELL, THAT’S A MURDERER.”
I THOUGHT, AT BEST, YOU MIGHT BARELY MANAGE
AND IT WOULD BE MY JOB TO TRY TO MITIGATE THE DAMAGE
‘CAUSE I’VE ALWAYS NEVER BELIEVED IN YOU
I NEVER ONCE DOUBTED DOUBTING YOU
WITH EVERY OPPORTUNITY THAT YOU BLEW
ALL MY WORST FEARS JUST KEPT COMING TRUE
YOU NEVER WERE A TEACHER’S PET
BUT YOU DID KILL A TEACHER’S PET
WITH EVERY HORRIFYING THING YOU’D SAY OR DO
I CONTINUED TO NEVER BELIEVE IN YOU
SOME PEOPLE ARE DESTINED TO FLY HIGH
OTHERS JUST GET REALLY, REALLY HIGH
SOME PEOPLE REACH FOR THE STARS
SOME JUST REACH FOR THE PANEL IN THE CEILING WHERE THEY KEEP THEIR DRUGS
I HELD OUT NO HOPE FOR SO LONG
BUT NOW, I ADMIT I GOT YOU ALL WRONG
‘CAUSE NOW, I ACTUALLY BELIEVE IN YOU
NO LONGER HAVE A TOTAL LACK OF FAITH IN YOU
APPARENTLY, THERE ARE THINGS YOU CAN DO
YOU’RE FULL OF POTENTIAL AND NO ONE KNEW
ALLOW ME TO TIP MY HAT TO YOU, SIR
‘CAUSE YOU’RE NO LONGER A TOTAL LOSER
IT FEELS STRANGE TO SAY IT, BUT IT’S TRUE
I WEIRDLY, SHOCKINGLY, COMPLETELY
BELIEVE IN YOU
I BELIEVE I BELIEVE I BELIEVE IN YOU
YES, I DO
YES, I DO

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The Bay Area Reporter: Obituary

Obituary: Billye Talmadge

by BAR staff

Billye Talmadge

Billye Talmadge

1929 — 2018

Billye Talmadge passed away October 24, 2018 in Portland, Oregon. Ms. Talmadge was one of the founders of Daughters of Bilitis. She, the late Del Martin, Phyllis Lyon, Helen Sandoz, and more were at the forefront of LGBT liberation in the 1950s and 1960s. They sheltered young lesbians and hired an attorney to help extricate lesbians from jail (it was a jail-able offense in most states to be a lesbian). They held private gatherings in their homes so lesbians had a safe place to meet. Her wise counsel helped many young women to accept themselves. With two Ph.D.s in education she was, at the foremost, a teacher. She won the Golden Apple award for her work with blind and deaf children. Anyone who ever heard her speak will never forget her velvet voice and ability to reach the very soul of those who would hear.

For more information, visit http://bathtubbulletin.com/billye-talmadge-1929-2018/.

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San Francisco Bay Times: In Memoriam

Edith Carney
Edith Carney, the mother of Patrick Carney, who is a founder of the Pink Triangle display constructed on Twin Peaks during Pride, died at age 95 after suffering from interstitial lung disease. Edith Carney died at age 95 after suffering from interstitial lung disease. Always supportive of Patrick, his husband Hossein and her other children and relatives, Edith traveled to San Francisco nearly every year to help with the Pink Triangle. Her positive energy could be felt whenever the display went up. The symbol was used by the Nazis in concentration camps to identify and shame homosexual prisoners, but it has since been embraced by the LGBTQ community as a symbol of pride and defiance, while serving as a reminder of the Holocaust.

Edith was a strong, loving and vibrant force within her family. She also had a successful career, having begun work in real estate at a young age. She was most proud of her family, however, and the Dodgers! As a baseball fan from Southern California, she enjoyed cheering on her team. Many of us at the San Francisco Bay Times were rooting for the Dodgers in the World Series this year, thinking of generous and kind-hearted Edith Carney.

Alana Devich Cyril
Cancer claimed the life of filmmaker Devich Cyril, who in 2016 wrote at CrowdRise: “I recently received the devastating news that I have stage 4 metastatic gastro-esophageal cancer, despite being a healthy 40-year-old woman with no risk factors.” As a creative spirit, she turned her shock and struggle into the poignant film My Life, Interrupted, which was first shown this past June at the Queer Women of Color Film Festival. Her spouse Malkia Devich Cyril is the founder of the Center for Media Justice. The couple devoted much of their time together toward working for civil rights for all. https://vimeo.com/277714367

Erika Luckett
Singer, musician and composer Erika Luckett of our local LGBT community recently lost her battle with cancer. From her performance at the 20th Anniversary of the Nobel Peace Prize Forum to being honored as “One of the 100 Most Outstanding Women of the Year” (along with Oprah, Madonna and Queen Elizabeth) by both The Jewish Post and Modern Woman Today Magazine, Luckett showed how music can transform and unite people across the globe.
http://www.erikaluckett.com/home/

Paul Miller
Miller, who volunteered for numerous LGBT causes, recently died of cancer. A 30-year survivor of HIV, he often worked to help others with HIV/AIDS. Miller was further known for his love of gardening and nature. A beautiful memorial reflecting many aspects of his life in San Francisco, from friends and family to his fondness of hummingbirds, was created by his sisters and placed at “Hibernia Beach,” the corner of Castro and 18th Streets. A Celebration of his Life will be held at 1 pm on Saturday, November 3, at the National AIDS Memorial Grove in Golden Gate Park.

Dr. Jerry Rabinowitz
One of the 11 victims of the shooting at Pittsburgh’s Tree of Life synagogue, Dr. Rabinowitz was known for the dignity and respect that he gave to all of his patients, and particularly those with HIV/AIDS. “Before there was effective treatment for fighting HIV itself, he was known in the community for keeping us alive the longest,” Michael Kerr, a former patient, posted on Facebook. “Thank you, Dr. Rabinowitiz, for having always been there during the most terrifying and frightening time of my life.” The 66-year-old physician initially was not in the basement of the synagogue when the shooting occurred, but his nephew Avishai Ostrin speculated to CNN that “when he heard shots he ran outside to try and see if anyone was hurt and needed a doctor. That was Uncle Jerry. That’s just what he did.”

Ntozake Shange
Playwright Shange wrote numerous acclaimed works, including the choreopoem for colored girls who have considered suicide/when the rainbow is enuf. The powerful theater piece, which debuted in 1976, tells the stories of seven women who have suffered oppression in a racist and sexist society. Shange said that it was inspired by events in her own life. It earned her Obie and Tony Awards, and is still performed, resonating with audiences worldwide. Born Paulette Williams in 1948, Shange studied at Barnard College and the University of Southern California, where she changed her name to the Zulu Ntozaka, meaning “she who comes with her own things” and Shange “who walks like a lion.” See this Poetry Foundation biography, which lists many of her works: https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poets/ntozake-shange

Billye Talmadge
Born in 1929, Talmadge was a founder in 1955 of the groundbreaking Daughters of Bilitis, which was the first lesbian civil and political rights organization in the U.S. She, along with Del Martin, Phyllis Lyons, Helen Sandoz and other brave individuals, were at the forefront of queer liberation for decades. A teacher, Talmadge earned two doctorates in education and won the Golden Apple award for her work helping disabled children. See Herstories to learn more about her remarkable life: http://herstories.prattinfoschool.nyc/omeka/collections/show/73

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Movie: “In Search of Greatness”


Note from Michael Kelly:

I’ve just read some reviews of this film and watched the trailer on IMDB; it is not yet playing near me.

It looks OK as a film, but one or more of the superstars talking about the how’s and why’s of their success may strike an important chord with some viewers.

–Michael

In Search of Greatness (2018)
Through the eyes of the greatest athletes of all time, IN SEARCH OF GREATNESS is a cinematic journey into the secrets of genius.

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Telling the Truth as a Means of Healing

A new documentary shows how one state is confronting Native American child removal.
dawnland_primary.jpg

 

When we think of the history of forced cultural assimilation of Native Americans into U.S. culture, we often point to residential schools. From the mid-19th to the early-20th centuries, residential schools removed Native American children from their communities, punished them for speaking their home language and practicing their religion, and attempted to assimilate them as working-class members of society. These residential schools are widely known to have been sites of abuse and trauma. But the story of removal of Native American children did not end with these schools. The new documentary Dawnland documents other more contemporary child removal practices and one state’s effort for justice.

In February 2013, the state of Maine launched the Maine Wabanaki-State Child Welfare Truth and Reconciliation Commission, the first government-mandated TRC in the United States. The commission was charged with establishing a more complete account of Native American foster care placement between 1978 and 2012 and with formulating policy recommendations to empower tribal communities and start to reverse generations of colonial violence.

Native American children are overrepresented in the child welfare system. In Maine, in 1972, Native children were placed in foster care at a rate 25.8 times that of non-Native children. They were often placed in non-Native homes, sometimes without any legal proof that their birth parents were “unfit.” Stories like these across the nation led to the passage of the Indian Child Welfare Act in 1978, which legally declared that it is in the best interest of Native American children to stay within their families or tribes. ICWA recognizes the potential damage that child removal does both to the children and their tribe as a whole: How can a tribe continue to exist if it cannot pass on its language, cultural traditions, and history to the next generation? As gkisedtanamoogk, co-chair of the Maine Wabanaki Child Welfare Truth and Reconciliation Commission, reflected in Dawnland on child-removal practices, “You take away a people’s understanding of who they are, their self-sufficiency, and you replace it with nothing.”

Yet decades after the passage of ICWA, Native American children are still removed from their homes at a disproportionately high rate. Between 2000 and 2013, Native children were removed at 5.1 times the rate of non-Native children in Maine. This is one reason the commission was formed. The commission, along with the advisory group Maine-Wabanaki REACH, or Reconciliation Engagement Advocacy Change Healing, began collecting stories in 2013. For the next two years, they gathered testimony from state child welfare staff, children who were placed in foster care or adopted, and parents in Maine’s four remaining tribes who had their children taken away. Dawnland is both an intimate lens into the personal and communal impacts of child removal practices and an exploration of the conflict that arises when White communities and communities of color jointly confront historical trauma and racism.

Dawnland, directed by Adam Mazo and Ben Pender-Cudlip, 2018

These tensions play out in real time in Dawnland. One  community event for gathering testimony did not have a high turnout, so members of Maine-Wabanaki REACH asked staff from the commission to leave the room to ensure all participants were comfortable sharing their truths. This did not go over well with the commission staff, the majority of whom were White women. REACH co-director Esther Anne Attean defended the decision, saying that the goal of truth-telling is “not about making White people feel welcome.” She argued that part of being an ally is recognizing when you need to leave the room and allow Native peoples the space to share their stories as a form of healing.

We are left to ponder: Whom is this truth-telling for? Is it to educate White people on colonial violence and how it continues to harm indigenous communities in Maine, or is it for the Native participants to heal and be heard? Can it simultaneously be both, or should one be privileged over another?

Though child removal is a sensitive and at times traumatic subject matter, conducting research and making recommendations is the easy part. Sustained healing and an assertive confrontation of colonial and White supremacist violence are much harder. But as the commission’s executive director, Charlotte Bacon, reflected in the report, “None of us is exempt from that responsibility.” We have a collective responsibility to address the ongoing violence of colonialism, and the impacts of child removal on tribal communities and tribal survival.

An elementary report card for Georgina Sappier (Passamaquoddy) from Mars Hill elementary in Maine for the years 1947–53. Photo by Ben Pender-Cudlip/Upstander Project.

As the testimony of children removed from their homes makes clear in the film, changing policy alone cannot end the impacts of colonial violence. The commission focused specifically on Native American children in foster care from 1978 to 2012—after the passage of ICWA. Whether intentional or not, racism from foster parents and racism from child welfare staff continues to traumatize Native families.

“My foster mother told me that I was at her house because nobody on the reservation wanted me. … And that she would save me from being Penobscot,” Dawn Neptune Adams said in the film. She also said she had her mouth washed out with soap when she spoke her Native language.

Like Adams’ foster mother, not everyone sees distancing Native children from their tribal cultures as violent. As with residential schools, some view it as benevolent. Jane Sheehan, a retired child welfare worker who worked in the system for decades, is shown in the film saying that “two sneakers for the feet is sometimes more important than learning an Indian dance.” Intentionally and aggressively confronting racism—particularly unintentional racism coming from ill-informed rather than overtly hateful viewpoints—must be addressed in any truth and reconciliation effort.

Tracy Rector, a producer for the film, is hopeful that Dawnland can help with this process. “In the majority of the screenings to date, the audiences have been primarily non-Native and more specifically White,” she told me. “The vast majority of these audience members often comment that they were not aware of the policies involved in colonization, the boarding schools, or forced adoption and foster care. I see and hear in these discussions that we are building allies.”

Dawnland makes clear that any effort to empower tribal sovereignty and right historical wrongs—what some may call reconciliation—must center indigenous leadership and indigenous healing. While it remains to be seen how Maine and its tribal communities will continue to work toward justice for those most affected by violent child welfare practices, truth-telling is a vital and historic first step. And non-Natives must be willing to listen deeply. As activist Harsha Walia asserted: “Non-Natives must be able to position ourselves as active and integral participants in a decolonization movement for political liberation, social transformation, renewed cultural kinships, and the development of an economic system that serves, rather than threatens, our collective life on this planet. Decolonization is as much a process as a goal.”

Abaki Beck wrote this article for The Good Money Issue, the Winter 2019 issue of YES! Magazine. Abaki is a free-lance writer and researcher passionate about Indigenous community resiliency, public health and racial justice. She is a member of the Blackfeet Nation of Montana and Red River Metis. You can find more of her writing on her website.
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How to Create a Zoom Meeting and Invite People to Join

First, watch this 45-second video about Zoom Meetings: https://youtu.be/VnyitUU4DUY
The following Zoom Invitation is one from my personal Zoom account because I didn’t want to use the Prosperos’ Pro Zoom account to illustrate my points.
But this invitation is just for illustration; it’s a genuine Zoom invite, but I won’t be holding that meeting! Emoji
The black type or blue type is what Zoom actually gives you when you schedule a Zoom meeting. The red type are my comments.  
 

I’ll cover how to schedule a Zoom meeting below the Zoom Invite.

Ok so this is how a Zoom Invitation looks when you schedule a meeting:

********************
Hi there,
Ben Gilberti is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting. <This you can change to whatever you want.
Topic: Ben Gilberti’s Zoom Meeting <This also you can change to whatever you want.
 
You can also enter here any more description about your meeting beyond the Topic.  
Time: Nov 9, 2018, 6:00 PM Eastern Time (US and Canada) <I usually put in a few more time zones here, since we are reaching globally, especially GMT (Greenwich Mean Time).  Anybody in the world will be able to tell when your meeting starts if you supply the GMT time. 
Join from PC, Mac, Linux, iOS or Android: https://zoom.us/j/225841423 <This is for joining the Zoom meeting you scheduled.  
Or iPhone one-tap :
    US: +16465588665,,225841423#  or +14086380986,,225841423#
Or Telephone:
    Dial(for higher quality, dial a number based on your current location):
        US: +1 646 558 8665  or +1 408 638 0986
    Meeting ID: 225 841 423 <You’ll need to use this number when you start your meeting.  I’ll show you what I mean below.
    International numbers available: https://zoom.us/u/adLBNwZwuu <The link above this one is actually International for using the Zoom interface.  This link is for International people who don’t have a computer and want to call in using their phone. If they click on this link, they’ll see the phone numbers to use outside of the USA. Most of them are toll-free.
 
You can put any photo of yourself or any kind of artwork here.
***************
To generate the above Zoom invitation, after you log on to Zoom, you’ll see this interface:
Inline image < this is not active  now

And all you have to do is click on “Schedule,” fill in the data for your meeting, and then click on Copy to Clipboard, and then paste the contents of the clipboard into your email, Facebook page, Twitter or Skype message.
To start your meeting, click on “Meetings” on the bottom of the above interface. That will open the following interface:
Inline image

Don’t click on the first “Start” button or it will start a completely different meeting.
If you hover of “Today,” if this was an active interface, it would open a new “Start” button that will be for the meeting you’ve invited people to attend. Usually, it will not say “Today” but rather the date your meeting is to occur. You can check to be sure that you are starting the right meeting by comparing the Meeting ID in the interface above with the Meeting ID that shows up on your meeting invite above. Make sure both meeting ID’s are the same. Start your meeting about ten minutes before it is scheduled to begin so people joining your meeting will find you there if they come early.
And remember, a Zoom meeting can be recorded and converted into a YouTube video that you can use to share with others.
If you don’t have Zoom on your computer, type “Zoom.us/download” in your browser, press enter, download Zoom, click on the “exe” file that will show up in the lower left-hand corner to install Zoom, sign-up for a free account, sign in, and you’ll get the interface shown above.
However, the friends or prospects you will be sending the Zoom Invitation to will not have to prepare in any way, they will be prompted to download zoom if they don’t already have it and will then automatically be placed in your meeting.
I encourage all of you to create Zoom meetings with your Free Zoom Account for your private circle of friends just for social reasons. Those meetings, started with a Free Zoom Account, have a time limit of 40 minutes.  The Prosperos Pro Zoom Account has no time limit.
Remember, Zoom meetings are video meetings, so remember to clean up, dress up and put on your makeup. Emoji
If you believe you may qualify for a Prosperos Pro Zoom Account, send an email to Rick Thomas and ask if you are eligible. Rick Thomas is the Administrator of the Prosperos Pro Zoom Account. But realize that the number of Prosperos Pro Zoom accounts is very limited.
Rick and I have created a 19-minute video about all of this.  For those of you in my Spontaneity Course, this video is spontaneous, because Rick and I didn’t plan anything in advance, we just started talking about how to create your own Zoom meeting and how to invite your friends.  Since the video is spontaneous, it’s slightly clumsy in a folksy, charming and almost humorous way, but it does the job. In the video, we even show you how to convert the recording of your Zoom meeting into a YouTube  video.
Here is the video Rick and I have made for you: https://youtu.be/nqbiN8TajvQ
And of course, I’m always available to answer questions.
Ben Gilberti
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