Tony Burgess – Head of UK & European division of Havening Techniques®

A Better Life Through Neuroscience

• ‘Iffirmational Havening’Since learning Havening techniques, I have been integrating the methods into much of my work when working with therapeutic clients, coaching and some training too.Another method which I use regularly with clients (developed with my partner years ago) is a 6-step belief change process, which helps those who have been ‘getting in their own way’. (The method is captured in our book ‘Beliefs and How to Change Them … For Good!’ http://www.aha– success.co.uk/beliefsbook.html).Step 3 of the 6-step belief change process is the human skill that we call ‘what iffing’. This is an activity that people often naturally do very effectively already – to torture themselves (‘what if I mess up?’, ‘what if I’m not good enough?’, ‘What if I can’t?’, ‘what if people don’t like me?’ etc) and given that it is so powerful, we ask them to harness their well-practised skill and put it to better use. What I mean is that we ask them to choose more empowering endings to the ‘what if …’ phrases. This serves to begin to open up new and refreshing possibilities and can counter existing unhelpful thinking and beliefs.What we have found is that when this is combined with havening touch it seems to be even more effective. I guess we can consider this activity to be a useful pre-cursor to affirmational havening. It allows the client to explore, generate and begin to ‘ease in’ those affirmational ideas. The ‘what if …’ serves to reduce resistance to the new possibilities (as the system does not need to commit to believing them … yet).The ‘what if … ’ structure, said with ‘tantalisingly tempting tonality’ (in their head or out loud during a session) excites the mind to consider a better perspective. When we do this work, clients have such a positive change in perspective that I can imagine their neurons reaching out for one another to test out possible new ‘circuits’. They also have a ‘takeaway’ tool to play with for themselves to reinforce the work we do in any session and also to apply to other areas they feel it is useful to work on.Over the years people have loved the ‘what iffing’ activity in our 6 step process and also use it in isolation for rapid state change too.We have taught many change facilitators the 6-step belief change method and many report to us that it has become one of their favourite tools for working with clients who have become ‘stuck’ in an unhelpful rut. When we teach it now, we suggest integrating havening touch to maximise effectiveness.Dr Ronald Ruden (developer of Havening Techniques) has now reported that he too been using this ‘what iffing’ activity combined with havening touch with his clients and is noticing some really encouraging changes. He has playfully given this blend the name of ‘Iffirmational havening’, which I love!Here are some of my clients’ favourite ‘what ifs’:
  
  • What if I’m better than I’ve been telling myself?’
  • ‘What if I can find a way?’
  • ‘What if I can have more influence over this than it first seems?’
  • ‘What if I tap into my greatest resourcefulness?’
  • ‘What if I forgive myself and others?’
  • ‘What if I remain a uniquely magnificent human being no matter what isgoing on in my life?’
  • ‘What if I am surrounded by opportunities and I just need to startnoticing them?’
  • ‘What if there is always a way?’
  • ‘What if I can always keep learning and adapting?’
  • ‘What if I am more than good enough?’
  • ‘What if I am deserving of the very best in life?’
  • ‘What if the universe is on my side?’
  • ‘What if I am in fact totally loveable?’
  • ‘What if I give myself permission to love myself?’
  • ‘What if I am perfect, even with any perceived imperfections?’
  • ‘What if I CAN?’
  • ‘What if I get into the driving seat of my own life?’
  • ‘What if, whatever happens, I am going to be fine?’
  • ‘What if I allow myself to be guided by my highest wisdom?’
  • ‘What if I already have everything I need, I just need to tap into it?’
  • ‘What if I am already whole and complete?’
  • ‘What if being ME is more than good enough’
  • ‘What if I give myself permission to celebrate who I am?’
  • ‘What if I count my blessings?’
  • ‘What if I can start to notice more of the great things in life?’
  • ‘What if I allow myself to feel gratitude for all the good things in life?’

Have fun experimenting with your own and encourage your clients to come up with their best ones too!

(Tony Burgesswww.aha-success.com      www.ditchyourtrauma.co.uk       00447989 469 570  tburgess@aha-success.com)

(Contributed by John Atwater, H.W.)